💩 SHITTY VENTURE CAPITAL, INC.

Contact Us (please don't)

We value communication, which is why we have made it impossible. Below are several ways to not reach us.

Headquarters
1 Burn Rate Plaza, Floor 0.5
A WeWork (the bad one)
San Francisco, CA, technically

Phone
1-800-NO-MOAT-X
(disconnected; rings to a hot tub)

Email
[email protected]
Auto-reply: "We are heads-down deploying capital and cannot deploy attention."

For Founders Seeking Investment:
Do not email. Do not call. Stand outside a coffee shop in Soma and say "pre-seed" loudly. We will materialize.

For Limited Partners Seeking Their Money Back:
This inbox is not monitored. It was never monitored. There is no inbox.

For Process Servers:
The Managing Partner is "traveling" and will be "traveling" indefinitely.


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